Should I even bother trying this?

I didnt even want to bother reading your 3 long paragraphs. So whatever you were saying in them, what you do in life is not as important as you think it is. Keep piece of mind your main focus in life. When you are an old senior citezen you will remember my words like it was yesterday, and say to yourself, "I should have listened to Steven" or "I'm glad I took his advice"